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Chapter 1 Delilah's POV My life has collected enough humiliations and gut-punches to teach me what real silence sounds like. I had it at tenstepping out of the school bathroom and realizing, too late, my skirt was tucked into my underwear while someone announced it like breaking news to the whole class. I had it again at thirteen, when the head cheerleader smacked me in the cafeteria because she decided I was looking at her boyfriend like he was dessert. I had it at sixteen, sitting in an office that smelled like paper and disappointment, hearing the principal tell me my parentsmy only familyhad died in a car wreck. And Im having it now. Twenty-four years old, standing in my apartment and watching my best friend of two decades and my boyfriend of five years fuck. In my bed. Together. But before we get to this absolute disaster, we have to rewind. ~ Earlier that day ~ Why are you calling this early? Sabrinas voice was thick with sleep when she answered. I snorted. Its after nine. Still too early, she complained. Its Thursday, I said, amused. Did you seriously go out on a weeknight? She yawnedloudand I heard her shifting around like shed dropped the phone somewhere in the sheets. Yeah, she said. That new club a couple towns over. Pulse? I asked, frowning as I added the last touch to the Christmas display in the front window of my shop. Santa Baby was playing low and sweet behind me. Dayton, Tennessee didnt do snow the way the movies promised, but we did Christmas like we meant it. Blossom Brew is mine. My dream, my pride, my whole heart sitting on Main Street with a bell over the door. Ive wanted a place like this for as long as I can remember, and a little over a year ago it stopped being a daydream and became real. Its a plant and flower shop stitched together with a caf. In a small town like ours, there isnt muchcertainly not a cozy spot with free Wi?Fi where you can sip coffee while surrounded by green things that feel alive. Weve got a couple coffee places and a Starbucks, sure, but Blossom Brew is different. Its fun. Its soft. Its ours. And I havent ditched the flower side, either. I still do arrangements and keep the plant shelves full. Weve even handled two weddings already. Regulars have started to feel like part of the furniturein the best way. Like Jackson, who comes in every Friday without fail to buy his wife flowers. Or Amelia and Sebastian, who show up daily like theyre clocking in. Sebastian does some kind of web designer work. I only know because he once thanked me for letting him camp out for hours on the Wi?Fi while buying nothing but coffee, then launched into his whole story about dropping out of college to chase his dream and how his parents hated it. Amelias a writer. Shes quiet, keeps to herself, and I only figured it out because I glanced at her laptop screen once or twice when she wasnt looking. Weve got the usual drip coffee, plus other drinks, bagels, muffins, pastriesenough to keep people lingering. Thats what I wanted: somewhere you could come and exhale. Somewhere you could exist without feeling watched and measured. Ive always loved plants and flowers. If Id had the guts to leave home, I probably would have studied botany. But I didnt leave. Dayton is where I grew up. Its where my parents are buried. Its where my people are. Ive been happy staying here, weaving myself into the community instead of running from it. And business has been good. Busy enough that Im not lying awake panicking like I did at the start. Things have been running smooth. Ive even got help nowif three employees counts as a crew. Alexander and Alexandra are twins, a few years younger than me, and they work like they were built for this place. And then theres Dianamy miracle. She handles all my finances and keeps me from accidentally setting my own dream on fire. She was friends with my parents, and when they died and there was no one else, she moved back to help raise me. She believed in Blossom Brew before it existed anywhere but my head. Im going to be grateful to her forever. Thats it, Sabrina said, dragging me back. It was amazing. We should go together sometime. Uh not really my vibe, I admitted, sliding the muffins into the display case. But funny you mention that. Trevor was in that same town last night. He didnt come home until really late. Said a client wanted to have drinks and he couldnt exactly refuse. There was a tiny pause. Oh really? Sabrina asked, and something about her tone didnt sit right. Yeah, I said, forcing a little laugh. What are the odds? Right, she muttered. Weird. I cleared my throat. Anyway. What are you doing later? Movie night? I need to talk to you about something. I actually have a date, she said. A date? I repeated. With who? Its a secret, she giggled. I made a face even though she couldnt see it. Since when do we keep secrets? Ill tell you soon, she promised. I swear. Okay, I said slowly. Well, if youre busy and Trevors working late again, Ill just stay here, catch up, and have dinner with Diana. Ill call you later, Sabrina said. After my date. Then she hung upno usual goodbye, no I love you. It was strange. But things between us have been strange for weeks. For months now, Ive had this itch in my chest that something isnt right between my best friend and my fianc. At first I wrote it off as Sabrina simply not liking Trevor. Trevor and I met in collegeclose enough that I could keep living at home. I worked at the local diner the whole time, too. He noticed me in a class we shared, and I did my best to ignore him. I wasnt interested in dating anyone. Life was already heavy, and school didnt come easy to me. I had to stay locked instudy constantly, work my shifts, keep my head above water. Men werent even on my list. Trevor didnt care. He went after me like persistence was his full-time job. He started showing up at the diner nearly every day, ordering something small and asking me out like it was a routine. Sometimes hed say, Just as friends, like that would make it easier. I said no every time. It wasnt because he was unattractive. He wasnt. Trevor had that all-American kind of handsomeperfectly styled brown hair, dark blue eyes, a strong jaw, and a smile that made people give him chances they shouldnt. He carried himself like he knew he belonged wherever he stood. Big, broad-shouldered, built like someone whod played footballand unlike a lot of guys, he actually cared about his grades. And then he stopped coming in. When he disappeared, it got under my skin more than it should have, and I hated that. About a week later he found me on campus and told me a group of local bikers who hung around the diner had freaked him out. I didnt ask what happened. I didnt need the details. Everyone in town knows the Redemption Riders MC look intimidating as hell. If I hadnt grown up here, I would have been scared too. Honestly, maybe I still should bemost people are at least careful around them. I probably would be, too, if one of them in particular didnt haunt my entire fucking life. But thats not the point. I said yes to Trevor after that. Just like thatone yes, and suddenly we were a couple. Sabrina was away at her own college then. When she came home for summer break, I introduced them, and I remember being embarrassed by how rude she was. Trevor was nice. People liked him. He was easy to like. Sabrina, though Sabrina has never loved sharing me. For years, she and Trevor didnt click at all. Until recently. Its not like theyve suddenly become best friends, but the edges have dulled in a way that doesnt make sense. Sabrina doesnt take shots at him every chance she gets anymore. Trevor used to groan when I even mentioned her, and now hes the one suggesting she come along with us. I cant pinpoint when it shifted. I just know that at some point they started going quiet and weird whenever the other one came up. I keep telling myself Im imagining it. Id planned to talk to Sabrina tonight, to finally say it out loud, but its probably nothing. Sabrina wouldnt do that to me. She wouldnt betray me. And Trevor Trevor loves me. Were getting married next month. Everything is locked in. The details are done. Diana is even finishing my dressmy mothers wedding dress. Its going to be perfect. I have to stop spiraling. I have to stop assuming the worst about my fianc and my best friend. Chapter 2 Delilah's POV The hours dragged, sticky and slow, the kind of day that refuses to hurry. Business came in waves. A bright-eyed bride-to-be stopped by to ask about having us cater her wedding, and for a minute I got to pretend life was simple. Then Judith pulled her usual stunt. The woman who owns Sweet Confections across the street makes it a routineevery couple of weeks like clockwork. Shell buy something from me, plant herself dead-center in the lobby, and perform outrage at full volume as if shes onstage. Coffee accidents, toppled plants, pastries mysteriously ending up smashed on my floor its unhinged behavior for somebody pushing forty. But sure. If chaos is her hobby, who am I to stand in the way? Except I can do chaos too. Most days I keep my temper leashed. Judith is one of the rare exceptions. Weve gone at it more than once with customers watching, and Diana has had to physically wedge herself between us. Diana even tried the polite routecalling Judiths husband, who couldnt have cared less, and then calling Judiths mother like we were in grade school. Nothing changed. Nothinguntil my so-called knight in shining armor started showing up. Wesley, I said, leaning on the counter, where is your mother, exactly? The seven-year-old didnt even look up from the coloring book spread in front of him. I told you. Shes gone, he said, bored as anything. Its just me and Dad now. I kept my face neutral, though inside I felt a spark of relief I didnt want to admit to. Whether Elena packed her bags and vanished or finally got shoved out of town, I didnt know. I just knew I hadnt laid eyes on her in over a year. Id assumed she was avoiding me. ElenaTriumph, or whatever name shes wearing these dayshas never been my favorite person. We grew up in the same schools. She had the cheerleader crowd; I had solitude. I didnt care about the difference, but she sure did. She loved taking shots at me. And I was never the type to swallow it quietly. It mostly stayed at words. Mostly. After graduation, Elena ended up at the Redemption Riders clubhouse on the edge of town. I heard the rumorsthat shed become a club bunny, that she was chasing patches. Back then I didnt even know what that meant. Now? You cant live around it and not learn. What I remember best is how she treated Wesley. When I waited tables at the diner, she would drop him into a booth and disappear. Just leave. Like the place came with free childcare. Big Raymond, the owner, once talked about putting the kid outside when he was barely three. I told him Id burn the diner down if he tried. Somehow that turned into me babysitting for nothing. Until the day I snapped. Wesley sat there for two straight hours, burning up with a fever, looking miserable and alone. That was about two years ago. I untied my apron, told Raymond Id be back, and drove with Wesley straight to the gates of the Redemption Riders MC. Once they let me through, I marched in with that sick little boy clinging to me and I ripped into a room full of bikers like I had a death wish. I didnt let go of Wesley until his idiot father swore he was taking him to the hospitalthen I followed them to make sure he didnt lie. That was the last day I ever saw Elena. Wesley, though? He still showed up at the diner constantly. It always irritated his fathernot because he hated me, but because Wesley never told anyone where he was going. How a whole clubhouse packed with adults can lose one kid every day is beyond me. Then why arent you at the clubhouse if its just you and your dad? I asked. Wesleys mouth pinched like hed bitten something sour. I exhaled, half a groan, because I knew what that expression usually meant. Most days, someone from the club came with him. When he turned up alone, it usually meant the same thing. WESLEY! The shout slammed into the shop. I startled so hard I felt my heart jump, and I spun toward the sound on instinct, angling myself between the boy and the front entrance. Jagger wouldnt hurt his sonof course he wouldntbut I have never been able to stomach adults roaring at kids. Jagger Rawley barreled in looking like temptation wrapped in bad decisions. Which only made me glare harder, because its a crime how unfairly hot he is. That face has been getting away with it for decades. When is his awkward phase supposed to arrive? Ive been waiting more than twenty years. Hes a couple years older than me, but we graduated the same year. We werent friends, didnt share a crowd, but we knew of each other. He was always good-looking; age has just made it ridiculous. Hes at least six-four, built like he wrestles trucks for fun, and he wears his cut like its welded to him. The Redemption Riders logopurple knight with a sword in a gothic stylesits bold across his back. My gaze, against my will, always gets snagged by the stitched name on the front. Jagger. Chapter 3 Hes been Jagger since middle school. Today his long golden-blond hair was yanked into a messy manbun, and he looked like hed been running on pure panic. His eyesblue threaded with greenwere sharp with anger. Stubble shadowed his jaw. His nose was crooked the way it gets after too many fights. He looked like a damn catalog model. And of course he had to be Wesleys father. Dont give me that look, Spike, he snapped as soon as he caught my expression. Lower your voice in my store, I told him, steady as I could manage. Then, quieter, because apparently I enjoy poking bears, Its Christmas. Try being cheerful for once, Jagger. He barked out a laugh, rolled his shoulders like he was trying to shake off rage, and dragged in a breath. Sorry, but my fucking kid didnt come home from school and the whole clubs been out looking for him Stop. I cut him off with a sharp flick of my hand. Seriously. Why didnt you come here first? Ill never understand it. He promised me hed quit bothering you, he said, jaw tight. He has never bothered me. I moved behind the counter. His mother did. Wesley can be here whenever he wants. Jaggers posture eased the tiniest amount. He planted his fists on the counter as if he needed the support. I poured him a black coffee and slid it over. He murmured thanks and took a drink. Ill handle it, he said. Start with telling him its dangerous to walk around alone, I muttered. For once, he didnt argue. That alone was weird. He gathered up Wesleys things, took his son, and walked out. I knew no lecture on earth would keep Wesley away. Hes told me he likes being here because its quiet, because Im calm, because I notice him. I dont doubt Jagger and the club care; Ive seen it. But his mom never did. And nothing about growing up in a motorcycle clubhouse screams peaceful. I forced my mind onto the rest of the day. After closing, I sent Alexandra home, counted inventory, set things up for the morning, checked sales, watered and fussed over the plants. In my car, keys barely in the ignition, Diana texted. She wasnt feeling great. Soup. Bed. I offered to come by. She refused, because of course she did. So I drove home. The first warning sign hit the second I stepped inside: two extra pairs of shoes by the door. Not mine. I recognized them immediatelyTrevors and Sabrinas. Trevor was supposed to come over after work, but Id thought hed be late. We still werent living together because he insisted neither apartment was big enough. I disagreed about his place, but whateverwed put a deposit down on something new and we were supposed to move in after the wedding. For half a second, I actually thought maybe they were planning something sweet. In a way, they were. The apartment was dead quiet, but every light was on. The Christmas tree glowed in the corner, a few presents tucked beneath it. On the table, over my decorative cloth, someone had arranged a little date-night scene: candles, wine glasses, place settings for two. It wouldve been cute. It wouldve been. Except the plates were smeared with leftovers, and the wine was already half gone. This wasnt waiting for me. This had already happenedwithout meand in my home. In my apartment, of all places. What the fuck. I moved through the rooms on silent feet, my stomach tightening with every step. Clothing littered the path down the hall like breadcrumbs leading to the obvious. My bedroom door was closed. I never leave it closed. I stopped there, hand hovering, because my body already understood what my brain was still trying to deny. I had noticed things. Weird gaps. A vibe. Little moments that didnt add up. Deep down, I had known something was wrong. Knowing didnt make it hurt less. A loud, fake moan floated through the door, snapping me fully into the moment. I eased it open just as the headboard started knocking against the wall. And there they were. My best friend and my fianc, naked and tangled together like I was the outsider. Trevor on top. Sabrina wrapped around him. His thrusts were ruthless, and the look on both their facespure pleasuremade bile rise in my throat. Why. My. Apartment. My first thought was absurdly practical: I just changed those sheets. My second was worse: How many nights had I slept in that bed without changing them, not knowing I was lying in my best friends wet spot? How much fun had she had with that secret, humming under all our little jokes? I could practically hear us singing that Megan Thee Stallion song and feel the humiliation curdle. I shouldve expected it. Sabrina has always needed the spotlight like oxygen. Shes always taken what was mineobjects, attention, space. Shes never wanted me to have other friends. And Trevor Trevor was my first real boyfriend. My first everything. I should have read the writing on the wall. But I loved her. I really believed she loved me too. Wed been friends since preschool. Wed survived everything side by side. She held my hand at my parents funeral. She knew what Trevor meant to me, knew what hed taken and what Id given. Shes done plenty of questionable things over the years. This wasnt questionable. This was ruin. She was my personthe only one left besides Diana. Everyone else is gone from my life. And apparently our whole lifelong friendship meant nothing to her at all. You like that, baby? Trevor panted, driving into her again. You like when I fuck you, dont you? Yes! Yes, Trevor! Sabrinas voice went theatrical, loud enough to make sure the world heard. Youre so bad, Trevor said, and each word landed like a hammer. Telling me we should have our date here tonight. I love it when we sneak around. So it had been her idea. Show me how bad I am, Sabrina giggled. That did it. I couldnt stand another second of their voices. They should have known me better than this. They should have known that when I get hurt, when I get furious, when my world collapses I dont go quietly. Not ever. Chapter 4 Content Warning: Violence Delilah's POV They were so wrapped up in each other that my front door might as well have been on another planet. I didnt announce myself. I just went straight to my closet and grabbed the shotgun Diana had all but forced into my hands. I wasnt supposed to own it. I wasnt even supposed to touch it. But Diana had been adamantif I insisted on living alone, I needed something more convincing than a baseball bat. Id argued. Id rolled my eyes. And now, standing in my bedroom doorway, I was done pretending shed been paranoid. I slid two shells in, then I cocked the thing with a sharp, final clack. That sound cut through them like ice water. Trevors head snapped around first. Confusion flashed across his face, then his eyes blew wide. He launched off the bed so hard he ended up on the floor in a tangle of limbs. Sabrina turned, still dazed, and when she saw me, her scream scraped the room raw. Delilah, she exhaled, like my name was a punch. Both of you, I said, voice steady in a way my body didnt match, get the fuck out. Trevor scrambled upright, palms half-raised like that would help. BabyDelilahcalm down. This isnt what you think. My gaze dropped, and my stomach twisted. No condom. So now I had to book an STI test. Full panel. Because my best friendmy sisterhad been fucking my fianc in my bed. And for all I knew, neither of them had been exclusive with anyone. Each other, other people me. Stop talking, I said, the words coming out like spit. He looked wrecked, eyes shiny with guilt. Please. I love you. I do. I swear I do. Right, I said, heat climbing into my throat. You love me so much you climbed into bed with the girl I used to call family. From the mattress, Sabrina let out a sound that was almost a laugh. She sat up against the headboard, completely unapologetic, not even bothering to cover herself. If anything, she looked inconveniencedlike Id interrupted her evening. Oh my God, she said, dragging her eyes over me. Its a man, Delilah. Youre not going to throw away us over a guy. Youre too sweet for that. You love me too much. Then she turned her head toward Trevor. And quit lying. You love me. I lifted my eyebrows and aimed the barrel at her. You actually think this wont matter? I asked, disbelief cracking through my voice. Trevor and I are getting married next month! I shouted. You were supposed to stand beside me. Christmas is next week. We had plans My breath hitched hard. And youve been fucking him. You did this, and youre acting like its nothing? It is nothing, Sabrina snapped as she pushed up off the bed and started toward me, because you two never loved each other. She didnt hesitate. She didnt soften it. Ive known since day one, she went on, eyes sharp. Trevor actually believed you loved him. But I know you, Delilah. You were pretending. My mouth fell open and stayed there. Part of it was her nervehow easily she said it, like it was obvious. But part of it was the sick, quiet recognition under my ribs. Trevor and I hadnt been fireworks. There hadnt been that kind of hunger. Id tried. Id performed it. Id made it believable enough that even I had started to buy my own act. Still, Id thought he was safe. Dependable. A man with sense. Someone I could trust. So how had I missed how spineless he really was? Sabrina kept walking until I raised the gun higher, forcing her to stop. She lifted her hands like I was the unreasonable one for having boundaries in my own bedroom. Delilah, she said, voice suddenly syrupy, I love you. I really do. Youre my sister. I didnt plan for anything with Trevor, but Her eyes slid to him. His eyes slid back. And thenlike they hadnt just gutted methey smiled at each other. We fell in love, Trevor blurted, and they both looked at me like this was supposed to explain everything. Love. He was saying love. Sabrinathis Sabrina, the one Id known foreverwas claiming love. A laugh snorted out of me before I could stop it. Sabrina? I said. In love? Sure. Its real, she insisted. We were going to tell you after Christmas. So, I said, voice thinning, days before my wedding. I stared at them. Why not tell me immediately and let everyone get refunds for the wedding bullshit? Trevors face flickered with somethingshame, maybe. It made my chest go heavy. I had believed in him. Maybe I hadnt been madly in love, but Id trusted him. Id been ready to promise him the rest of my life. And hed picked her. The wedding is still happening, Sabrina said, quiet and firm, like she was delivering a decision she had every right to make. Still happening. Just not for me. My throat tightened until it hurt. You two are getting married? I managed, tears burning behind my eyes. Trevor swallowed. Yes, he said, wary. Sabrina had been there for every choice. Every detail. It had been my dreamsmall enough to feel intimate, and I didnt have family to fill seats anyway. The Conservatory had been the centerpiece, the one thing Id wanted since I was a kid. Booking it had taken two years of waiting; that was why wed pushed the date. And now she was going to walk down that aisle. With my fianc. I would never get married there. Id probably never look at another man and believe a single word again. My breath came too shallow. The apartment felt smaller by the second, like the walls were leaning in. Was this the plan? I asked, eyes narrowing on her. While I was building my wedding, were you really using me to organize yours? It didnt start until after you got the Conservatory, she said quickly. I never wanted it to end up like this, Delilah. I just Never wanted this? I cut in, a bitter sound scraping out. You told him I didnt love him. You shoved yourself into our relationship. You did all of this, Sabrina. On purpose. My grip tightened on the stock. You went after him hoping hed dump me, I accused, voice rising. You expected him to break it off. You just didnt expect to catch feelingsor for me to cut you out. Her lips parted. You wouldnt, she whispered. Oh, I would, I said, lifting the barrel toward both of them. And I am. Get dressed and get out. Two minutes. I never want to see either of you again. You dont mean Get the fuck out! I screamed over her. Before I fucking shoot! Sabrina rolled her eyes like I was embarrassing her. Please, she said, dripping disdain. You dont have the balls. Something inside me broke clean in half. Maybe it was my bed. Maybe it was the realization that shed steered this whole disaster with a smile. Maybe it was Trevor standing there, useless and silent. Maybe it was Sabrina dismissing my pain like I was hysterical for not applauding their betrayal. Whatever it was, it snapped. I pulled the trigger. The blast cracked through the room, loud enough to vibrate my teeth. Trevor and Sabrina shrieked. The shot punched into the wall, leaving a jagged hole. I worked the action againanother hard, metallic clickand this time their faces finally shifted into real fear. I wasnt interested in negotiating anymore. I fired again, lower, the shot tearing into the floor near their feet. They screamed and bolted, scrambling for anythingclothes, dignity, the door. I reloaded and followed them into the hallway. I might have chased them all the way to the front entrance. I might have kept firing until Id sent five rounds total screaming into drywall and whatever else they missed by inches. They tumbled outside still completely naked. Youre fucking insane! Trevor yelled as he yanked open his driver-side door. I shot again. Glass explodedhis back windshield shattered outward. Delilah! Sabrina screamed. This is too far! Nah, I said, feeding another shell in. Too far would be me shooting him in the nuts so you two cant have kids. I leveled the gun right at what he cared about most. He dove into the seat before I could follow through. This isnt over! Sabrina shouted as she climbed in. You will forgive me! Ill see you at the wedding! Trevor peeled out of the lot like hed stolen the car. I stood there for a second, watching taillights vanish, trying to process the sheer lunacy of them calling me crazy while expecting me to swallow their betrayal and show up smiling. It was revolting. And then reality dropped like a weight. I lived in an apartment complex. I had just unloaded an illegal shotgun a ridiculous number of times. The first sign of exactly how bad that was came in the form of flashing red and blue lights and sirens wailing closer. Aw, shit, I muttered. Diana was going to be furious. Chapter 5 Delilah's POV Jesus Christ, Delyou really stepped in it this time, Officer Morrison said, stopping at the bars like hed been assigned to deliver the same bad-news speech on a loop. I let out a long, tired breath. Fifth cop tonight, same line. Thats small-town life for you. Some of them had gone to school with me. The rest had known my parents well enough to talk about them like they were still around. Theyd been the kind of people everybody leaned onDad running into burning buildings, Mom working double shifts and still finding time to take care of strangers. They didnt have blood relatives here, but they built something that looked a lot like family anyway. And then they died, sudden and cruel, and the whole town carried it like a bruise. I wasnt like them. I didnt collect people. I collected plants. I could spend hours in a garden or disappear on a trail and be perfectly fine with silence. I knew how to be polite because theyd taught me, but being courteous isnt the same as being beloved. I miss them. Derek Morrison, thoughhed always been closer than most. Wed overlapped in garden club in high school. He was a genuinely decent guy, and wed talked enough over the years that he didnt feel like a stranger, but friend might have been too generous. His parents had known mine, and Id always assumed his softness toward me came from the same place everyone elses did. Pity. You gonna tell anyone what happened? he asked. Diana told me she gave you that shotgun for protection after Captain Reynolds called her. She cant wrap her head around why youd fire it unless somebody came at you. I tipped my head back against the wall. The concrete was damp and smelled like old bleach and worse decisions. I scanned the tiny cell like it might offer an exit if I looked hard enough. Somewhere out in the station, Christmas music played quietlycheerful bells and soft vocals, like the building itself had decided to pretend it wasnt a police station for the month of December. Theyd even strung lights along the corridor. The cells glowed faintly with holiday colors. It was absurdly cute. It was also the last place Id ever pictured myself. I wasnt alone in here. There was another woman on the benchlong hair, tight clothes, the kind of makeup that looked like armor. My first thought had been ugly and unfair, and then recognition hit. She wasnt just some random drunk; she was one of the Redemption Riders club bunnies. One of the friendlier ones. When I asked, shed rolled her eyes and said a cop had hauled her in because hed decided she was soliciting. Apparently she was waiting for someone from the club to show up and raise holy hell over the mistake. Wed talked awhile. Her name was Sugar, which fitsweet voice, warm presence, pretty brown skin. Shed asked what Id done, and Id told her in a low voice. Not because I was embarrassed. Because every extra minute in this cell meant I didnt have to go home yet. Home meant reality. Home meant setting fire to my own bedmetaphorically, maybe literally. It meant packing up anything that still carried the shape of my parents. It meant calling the handful of people I actually kept close and explaining that my wedding wasnt my wedding anymore. And if Im being honest, all of it would feel less impossible if I still had my best friend. I had Diana. Shed been like a second mother since the day my parents were gone. But shed already spent nine years holding me up, and I hated adding more weight to her arms. Shed uprooted her life to come here and take care of me. I didnt want to make that her forever. God. Why did it have to be Sabrina? Dianas scared for you, Del, Derek said, voice softer now. Just tell us what went down. The captain might let you walk if you explain it. I rubbed my eyes and debated surrendering. I was exhausted. Diana was probably spiraling, calling and calling. Sabrina, of course, was probably ignoring every ring. Or worseanswering just to savor it. The thought made my jaw ache. For what its worth, Sugar cut in, leaning forward, hes gonna cut you loose once you speak up. And if youre asking me? Sounds like somebody had it coming. A laugh almost escaped me. Instead I smiled at her. By the way, I asked, hows Wesley? Sugar blinked. Jaggers kid? Yeah. The adorable little guy with a dips I stopped, then didnt. With a dipshit for a dad and a total skank for a mom. Sugar barked out a laugh, loud enough it bounced off the bars. Oh, she said, wiping at her eye. Youre her. Youre the one he wont shut up about. Thatd be me, I muttered. I didnt realize, she said, still grinning. He calls you Spike. I scrunched my face. Wesley doesnt call me that. Jagger does. Maybe she had wires crossed. Or maybe Jagger went back to the clubhouse and ran his mouth about me. Good. Let him. Let me live in his head rent-free. Let him whine to his club brothers like the baby he is. I dont even understand why he gets under my skin the way he does. He just does. One look at his smug, stupidly sexy face and I want to hit him. The more tattoos he adds, the more it irritates me, like someone gave him permission to become even more infuriating. Its always been like that between us. Which is a shame, because his kid is perfectionand looks exactly like him. At least Wesley didnt get stuck looking like his mother. Not that shes ugly. Shes just shes her. Derek frowned. What are we talking about? I exhaled, like my lungs were filing a formal complaint. I went home, I said, and Trevor was in my bed with another woman. Dereks eyes went round. Trevor? As inyour fianc? Yep. I made the p pop because it felt like the only sharp thing I still owned. But that He shook his head, searching for the version of reality he preferred. That doesnt line up. He loves you. Everybody sees it. Then everybodys fucking stupid, I said. Sugar made a small snorting sound, like she couldnt help it. Derek tried again. Who was she? What happened after you walked in? My throat tightened. It was Sabrina, I said, barely above a whisper. His shock didnt fadeit deepened. His mouth opened, then closed. He stared at me like I might laugh and say gotcha. I didnt. This wasnt a prank. Chapter 6 After a beat, he finally managed, Sabrina He swallowed. I mean I can believe shed do something like that to you. You can? But Trevor? he went on. I saw him at the store last week. He was talking about the wedding, saying he couldnt wait Oh, Im sure, I said flatly. Because theres still going to be a wedding. Oh shit, Sugar breathed, immediately getting it. Derek didnt. Youre still marrying him after he fucked your best friend? I crossed my arms and stared him down. Yes, Derek. Obviously. I caught him in my bed with my best friend, ran them out of my apartment complex while firing a shotgun at them, and then I decided we should totally stay on schedule. His expression shifted, slow and horrified. You dont mean She told me theyre in love, I said. Then she had the audacity to say Id get over it because I care about her too much to let a guy come between us. Tears pooled, hot and humiliating, and I forced them to stay put. She did it right before my favorite holiday, I continued, voice shaking with fury, and acted like I was being dramatic. Like shed done me some kind of favor. I locked eyes with him. So yeah, I chased them with the shotgun. Theyre lucky I didnt actually hit either of them. I could have. I shouldve shot Trevor in the nuts and taken out one of Sabrinas fake boobs. Sugar lost it, cackling into her hand. Girl, she wheezed, I like you. Youre a good time. Derek dragged a hand down his face and let out a breath. Ill tell Captain Reynolds. Hes probably going to want a statement. Hell want to talk to you himself. Tell him to take his sweet time, I said. Ill try to make it quick, Del No. Seriously, I cut in. Slow is fine. The longer this takes, the longer I dont have to go deal with my life. Sotake your time. Understanding flickered across his face. He nodded once and headed out. Captain Reynolds had been around foreverback when my parents were still alive, back when my world still made sense. Hed been my dads friend. His wife had been my moms friend. Then again, everyone had been their friend. After Derek left, Sugar leaned back against the wall. I cant believe that bitch really had the nerve to steal your whole wedding. I laughed, but it sounded empty. Sabrinas always had that pull, I said, eyes fixed on the concrete. Charismatic. Loud. She needs a spotlight like she needs air. I stared at nothing and kept going. I never cared much because Ive always preferred the background. But shes been taking things from me our whole liveslittle stuff at first. Toys. Attention. Friends. Projects. Clothes. All kinds of shit. My throat tightened again. I let it slide because I told myself she needed it more. I never believed shed do this, I said, voice quieter. But the more I replay everything, the more I realize I shouldve known. I even had a feeling, and I still convinced myself she wouldnt cross that line. Not to me. Not like this. I swallowed. And then she didnt just sleep with him, I added. She took the wedding too. I pressed my lips together, trying to make sense of the mess. And shes not wrong about one thing. I dont think I loved Trevor. Maybe she does. Maybe this happened because Im not I searched for the word that hurt the least. not very expressive. Maybe its better it blew up now. The second the words left my mouth, I wanted to shove them back in. Listen to me dumping this onto a stranger. Sugars voice softened. Even if all thats true, it doesnt make it sting any less. She was supposed to be your person. This was betrayal, plain and simple. You deserve better than both of them. I gave her a small, grateful smile. Youre right, I said. It still hurts like hell, and I do deserve better. I stared at my hands. I cant stop thinking about how intentional it was. Like she aimed for this. And the worst part? I let out a shaky breath. She stole the venue Ive wanted my whole life. My parents got married there. I booked it two years ago. Two years. My voice went thin. Now shes going to stain it. Even if I met someone else someday, Id never stand there without thinking about this. You know? Sugar tilted her head. Wanna find her and beat her ass when we get out? A soft laugh escaped me. I might take you up on that, I said. Hold onto it, sweetheart, she replied. Karma always circles back. Those two are gonna get theirs. Thanks, Sugar, I whispered. I hoped she was right. And I hoped Id be there to watch.