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"My coworker placed a wrapped baby gift on my desk this morning. It was for me. She was the third nurse this month to assume I was pregnant. I'm 30. I work in OB triage. I have been trying for 4 years." I am an obstetric triage nurse. 7 years working the front line of a high-volume L&D unit. The gift was a Christmas-wrapped box with pink ribbon. She had placed it on the corner of my desk before report. She had not asked first. She had assumed. She was the third nurse this month. The first had been a charge nurse, in the breakroom, who had told me to "take it easy in the chairs". The second had been an OB resident, in the elevator, who had asked me when I was due. The third had wrapped a box. I am 30. My husband and I have been trying for 4 years. We have done 3 IUI cycles. We have started 2 IVF cycles and canceled both before retrieval due to "PCOS hyperresponse." We have spent $19,000. I work in the unit where the women I cannot become walk through the door. The PCOS Belly That Triages Itself : Here is what they do not tell you about being a triage nurse with PCOS and a 4-year TTC history: You greet women in active labor every shift. You take their blood pressure. You strap on the monitors. You write down the gravida and parity at the top of every triage form. You write G3 P0 on your own paperwork every appointment. From 24 to 30 I gained 32 pounds. Waist from 27 to 36 inches. PCOS pouch by 25. Round hard lower belly by 27. By 30 my scrub top did not move when I bent over a stretcher. The patients had been mistaking me for one of them for 4 months. The coworkers had started this month. The Triage Bay Where I Watched The Door : OB triage is the catch basin for women whose bodies did what mine had not. I had been the nurse on intake when 23-year-olds with no medical history walked in 39 weeks pregnant. I had been the nurse when 36-year-olds with their fifth pregnancy walked in for monitoring. I had been the nurse when a 41-year-old at 32 weeks walked in with vaginal bleeding and I had to wheel her past 3 other women her age in the waiting room. I had not been the nurse with my own monitor strapped on. The $4,000 I Had Spent Trying To Cross The Hallway : Inositol at fertility dose with D-chiro and N-acetyl-cysteine ($720 over 8 months). Insulin moved from 25 to 22. Cycles came back at month 4 and stopped at month 6. Letrozole through my RE for 6 cycles ($840 in copays). 2 ovulatory cycles. Both negative. PCOS fertility dietitian with 30-day liver reset ($1,200 for 14 weeks). Lost 8 pounds. Cycles returned. Did not conceive. Acupuncture with a fertility-focused practitioner ($780 over 5 months). 2 light cycles. Berberine plus inositol stack with myo-inositol high-dose ($460 over 7 months). HOMA-IR moved from 5.3 to 5.0. Total: $4,000. Waist: 36 to 35.5. The next IVF cycle was scheduled in 2 months. What A Doula Taught Me Through A Patient : Sahar. She is a doula my unit had worked with for 9 years. She had her last baby at 38 after a 6-year struggle. She had stopped doulaing for a year and come back in March. She was 39 weeks pregnant again. She had walked into my triage that morning for a non-stress test before the wrapped box arrived on my desk. I asked her between contractions on the monitor. "Sahar. You are 41. How did this one happen." She held her right wrist out. A bracelet. "My acupuncturist trained at the same school as my obstetrician's wife. She told me PCOS belly is two locks. The insulin storage lock and the ovulation lock. Cortisol holds both shut. The bracelet calms the nervous system. The cortisol drops. Both locks open at the same time. My belly emptied. My ovulation came back. I conceived in week 9." She had lost 31 pounds in the year before her conception. Her HOMA-IR had gone from 4.9 to 1.2. "How much?" "$65." I ordered it from the supply closet that afternoon. My 14-Week Transformation : Weeks 1 through 4: Sleep deeper inside a week. Cortisol crashes after night-shift report softened. Morning bloat decreased. Cycle returned at week 4. Waist: 34 inches. Weeks 5 through 8: PCOS pouch visibly smaller. Cycle regular at week 7. Lost 10 pounds. Waist: 31 inches. Weeks 9 through 12: Waist coming back. Lost 8 more. Ovulation confirmed week 10 on at-home LH strips. Waist: 28.5 inches. Weeks 13 through 14: Lower belly flat. Lost 5 more. Waist: 26.5 inches. Total: 23 pounds. 9.5 inches off my waist. HOMA-IR 5.3 to 1.1. The Triage Form I Filled Out Last Friday : Same triage bay. Same paperwork. G4 P0. Sent home with a positive HCG and a 5-week follow-up with my own RE. The wrapped box from the morning of the wrong assumption is still under my desk. I have not opened it. I am saving it for the week the assumption is right. 8 Weeks Later : The coworker who left the box has been told I am pregnant. She cried. So did the resident in the elevator. The charge nurse who told me to "take it easy in the chairs" did not. Sahar delivered a girl 6 weeks after I conceived. She brought the baby into our unit for a meet and greet on a Tuesday morning shift. I am 9 weeks pregnant. The IVF cycle scheduled for next month has been canceled. My RE asked me what I had done. I sent her the brand. The OB Triage Nurse Truth : Here is what 7 years on the front line of L&D taught me: I had been writing G3 P0 on my chart for 4 years while my coworkers brought me wrapped boxes for a baby I could not make. The PCOS belly and the empty uterus were the same lock. The system had been treating the belly with one drug and the uterus with another. Nobody had been treating the cortisol that was holding both shut. A $65 bracelet broke both locks. The belly emptied. The uterus filled. 👉 If your PCOS belly will not respond to anything you have tried, if your coworkers have assumed you were pregnant when you were not, if your monitor strap is the only one you have not worn in your own triage bay... Click below to discover the Kalm Bracelet. Just $65 at the official store. Wear it consistently and measure your waist every 2 weeks for 14 weeks. https://mykalm.co/products/bracelet-weight-loss-solution