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Many men I speak to feel downtrodden, rejected and ignored. These men are ghosted and mistreated by women. These men are told that it’s all their fault. They need to “be better” and “do better”. These men are good-hearted men who lack some of the external packaging, which means they sell themselves short. They may lack some charisma and leadership, but they make up for it in kindness, thoughtfulness and emotional availability. But these men are invisible in the noise that is made online by women claiming all men are commitment phobes, emotionally unavailable and narcissistic. But these men tell me stories to be constantly told “there wasn’t a spark”, “I just see you as a friend” or given the hot/cold treatment for months. So we must also acknowledge that there are plenty of women out there who are unhealed and are repelled by good men. The Landscape of dating is way more nuanced than one side is good and the other is bad. It's way more nuanced than 'they are no good men' or 'they're no good women.' Too often, we gaslight men into believing that all their dating and relationship issues are purely on them, but in my work, up close in their lives, I see a way more nuanced picture of a quick-to-judge woman (among many other things) and their lack of direction, expression or spark. Be mindful of lazy generalisations, they only serve to make you angry or not see your own responsibility and blind spots. P.S. The thing we don't interrogate enough in ourselves is what we are attracted to and why. Why we didn't feel the spark with someone, why, and is it really important to feel the spark 2 hours after knowing someone? We know that much of what we are attracted to is unconscious and then most likely connected to our childhood wounds. ✅ Men, do you want to step deeply into your healthy masculinity in your dating, relationships and life, but aren't sure how? 👉🏽 DM "Pear" to get your FREE spot for my Re-Masculate Masterclass on 25th Feb