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92% of children in 1957 were potty trained by 18 months. Today the average is 35 months for girls, 39 months for boys. What changed? Disposable diapers. And I'm sitting here absolutely furious because I've wasted over a year waiting for my daughter to show readiness signs that were never going to come. — So for the past 14 months everyone kept telling me "wait until she's ready." My pediatrician gave me this whole checklist of readiness signs to watch for. Stays dry for 2 hours, shows interest in the potty, can follow simple instructions. So I waited and watched while she stayed in pull-ups. And every few weeks I'd think "okay maybe she's ready now?" But there was always one sign missing so I'd tell myself just wait a little longer. Month after month after month. Meanwhile she's 3 and a half and I'm watching 2-year-olds at the playground already trained. And I'd think "what am I doing wrong?" But everyone said don't rush it, she'll tell you when she's ready. So I kept waiting. For 14 months. While she stayed comfortable in disposables that I changed 6 times a day. — So last week I was scrolling Reddit at 11 PM reading through tips that might help. And I saw this comment that made me stop cold. "92% of children in 1957 were toilet trained by 18 months." Then: "The current average is 35 months for girls, 39 months for boys." And I'm staring at my phone thinking... wait, WHAT? Kids used to train at 18 months and now it's past 3 years old? So I kept reading and the next line actually pissed me off. "The main reason the average age keeps rising is disposable diapers." Like the timeline DOUBLED because of diapers? And I've been sitting here waiting for readiness for over a year while the diapers were the problem the whole time? So I went down a complete rabbit hole that night. I found data from the American Academy of Family Physicians. In the 1940s, training started before 18 months. Now it starts between 21 and 36 months. And only 40 to 60 percent of kids even COMPLETE training by 36 months. Like half of kids aren't trained by 3 years old now. But in 1957, 92% were done by 18 months. These are all legit stats I found, like what??!! The timeline didn't change because kids changed. It changed because diapers changed. And I'm sitting there at midnight getting angrier by the minute. Because I wasted 14 months waiting for signs that disposables were actively preventing. — So the next morning I posted in the group asking "how do diapers delay training?" And a child psychologist who specializes in toddler behavior replied within an hour. She said "modern disposables create something called sensory erasure and that breaks operant conditioning." And I'm thinking okay, explain that in English because I haven't got a CLUE what any of that means. Let me try to explain it simply: So she said operant conditioning is how all learning works. You do something, you feel a result, your brain connects the two. Touch a hot stove, feel pain, learn not to touch it. Pee in your pants, feel wetness, learn to use the potty instead. But disposable diapers remove the "feel a result" part completely. When toddlers pee in a disposable, it absorbs in seconds. They never feel wet, so the learning signal gets erased before the brain can process it. No Wetness = No Signal = No Learning. So their brain never connects "I peed" with "something happened." This is sensory erasure — the learning signal gets erased before the brain can process it. Like imagine trying to teach a kid not to touch a hot stove that never gets hot. They'd touch it forever because there's no consequence to learn from. And THIS is why we're told to wait for readiness. Without sensory feedback, kids genuinely don't develop awareness. But it's not that they're not ready — the diapers are blocking the signal that creates readiness. So she said in the 1940s and 50s, kids wore cloth diapers that stayed wet. They felt it immediately and their brain made the connection fast. So parents didn't wait for readiness — kids developed it naturally through sensory feedback. But disposables removed that feedback and now we wait hoping awareness magically appears. When really we're waiting for something the diapers are actively preventing. She also mentioned something that chilled me to the bone: 'There is a critical biological window for this connection. Between 18 and 30 months, the brain is WIRED to learn this loop. By keeping them in disposables past age 3, you aren't just delaying the skill... you are actively fighting against their brain's natural development window.' I felt sick. I wasn't just 'waiting'—I was letting the window close. Is this why I see so many parents online have issues with toddlers 4+ years old? — So I'm reading this absolutely FUMING. I've been waiting 14 months for my daughter to "show signs" she's ready. But the pull-ups have been erasing the exact signals that would create those signs. "So what do I do now?" And she said you can't go back to cloth diapers because at 3.5 that's just chaos. But you can't keep waiting in pull-ups hoping she magically develops awareness they're blocking. So you need training pants that restore the sensory feedback. When kids pee in them, they feel it immediately. Pee → Feel wet → Learn to stop doing that. The learning loop finally gets completed. So she recommended UpAiry training pants. They're designed with Feel & Learn technology that creates immediate sensory feedback. Like they restore the learning signal that disposables erase. I asked if I could just buy cheap cotton ones from Amazon. She said NO. 'She said most training pants are really sh*t, especially the ones on amazon. They often just leak everywhere, and use polyesters which can give toddlers rashes.' She recommended UpAiry because they are the only ones engineered to have that wetness feeling while being 100% cotton. She said these ones were the best she had used with her daughter These actually let kids feel wetness long enough for their brain to make the connection. — So I ordered them that day because I was done waiting. Day 1 she had 4 accidents but came to tell me about every single one. For the first time in her life, she didn't just keep playing like a zombie. She STOPPED. She looked down. Her eyes went wide. The "autopilot" was finally broken. Even though it was an accident, I wanted to cry with relief. For 14 months she had been numb to her own body. Suddenly, the lights were on. The sensory feedback was finally reaching her brain. Day 3 she said "Mommy I'm wet" BEFORE I even noticed. We didn't make it to the potty in time but she recognized it before it was over. That awareness I waited 14 months for appeared in 3 days. Week 1 she started walking to the potty on her own. No prompting, no reminders, just responding to her body's signals. Week 2 she had 2 accidents total. My mom came over and said "wait, she's actually trained now?" I said "yeah, once I stopped using something that erased the learning signal." Week 3 we went to Target for over an hour and she stayed dry. She told me once she needed to go and we made it. LIFE CHANGING.... — Also!!! I posted about this in the original thread. Three other moms messaged me — all waiting months for readiness, all using pull-ups. I sent them the link and two weeks later all three said their kids trained faster than expected. One said "my daughter went from zero awareness to telling me in under 2 weeks." The sensory feedback did what 8 months of waiting couldn't. — So if you've been waiting months or years for readiness signs that aren't coming... What they're wearing might be erasing the sensory feedback that creates readiness. Kids trained at 18 months before disposables. Now it's 35+ months because we're using something that breaks the learning loop. Hope this helps someone else who wasted months waiting like I did. EDIT: RIP my DM's 😅 I didn’t realize so many of us were in the same boat! I can't reply to everyone so here is the link to the kit she told me to get: https://www.upairy.com/pages/training-underwear This page should answer all the questions you have about them too.